Ahmusings

The 98% humorous musings of M. Lizabeth Currain

Fashion Week Ruins Everything According to Wealthy Neighborhood

In dishonor of New York Fashion Week (Feb 9th-16th) I am going to be sharing some fashion related thoughts with all of you throughout the week. As a note, I have a degree in Fashion Design and spent some time working for various fashion companies. It was the worst. I continue to have opinions about fashion, the main one being: Seriously, what the fuck are you wearing? So for the next week don your best headband and enjoy the ride.

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Yesterday the New York Times ran an article about Fashion Week taking over Damrosch Park in Lincoln Center and annoying the neighborhood’s inhabitants.

The park is occupied (not by dirty hippies, like that other park) ten months out of the year due to Fall and Spring Fashion weeks, The Big Apple Circus from October to January, and private parties also under ritzy tents during the spring.

“Residents and some members of Community Board 7 said that in the past they had not looked forward to the four-month takeover of the park by the Big Apple Circus, but that they had grown used to it. Their frustration mounted, however, when Fashion Week arrived.

“It was the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back,” said Susan Levy, a resident of the Alfred.”

And my personal favorite:

“‘It’s an assault on the neighborhood,’ said Michael Graff, a lawyer who lives in the nearby Alfred condominium tower.”

Forgive me if I can’t seem to find my sympathy for Mr. Graff, who likely paid a million dollars for the condo he currently lives in. Hey, guess what Michael, my neighborhood is loud 24/7 and I don’t have the luxury of being 38-stories above the noise. I sleep with earplugs because the woman above me clomps around like a Clydesdale. I think you’ll survive.

“City officials brushed aside the criticism, saying that Damrosch Park was a hard-surface plaza with few visitors in winter. They argued that residents had ample access to nearby parkland, including Central Park, and said that many thousands of New Yorkers were able to enjoy the circus and the fashion shows.

“Fashion Week generates $865 million in economic activity each year and helps create jobs in one of our city’s most important industries,” said Julie Wood, a spokeswoman for Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg.”

There seems to be a lot of confusion about where some of those funds are being put and the NYC Park Advocates naturally think that the money Fashion Week pays Lincoln Center to use the park space should be put back into the city general fund instead of being used to finance fancy parties for rich people.

If Fashion Week gets kicked out Lincoln Center, where else can it go? Have the residents of the Lincoln Center area ever stopped for a second to think about that? There are literally no parks left for them to destroy if they live Damrosch! Bryant Park has already said, “Hell to the No” about fashion week! Central Park is all like, “Dahling, Fashion Week is for people who don’t know any better.” And Union Square is like, “PICK ME, PICK ME!” And no one likes desperation.

Next year I think it should be, “Honda Fashion Week at Flushing Meadows Park.” Just to wad everyone’s panties while they figure out how to get there.

Biggest Loser Recap: Episode 7

I present to you my thoughts on Week Six of The Biggest Loser in Haiku* form.

Dolvett and Conda in her hometown
Conda has daddy issues, surprise
We all still hate you

Teammates write nice words
Must have been hard to find them
Since she sucks so bad.

Daphne climbing stairs
Hardwork, revenge for your bro
Put an end to Conda please

Red loses weigh in, duh
Bold lies at voting always
Stop with the fake tears

People can’t vote right
A sharp knife in Santa’s back
No presents this year

There you have it guys! All you needed to know about this week’s episode of The Biggest Loser! Let me know what you think in the comments! Hopefully next week will be the end of Conda! Can we all agree that she is the worst thing to happen to biggest loser since John last season?

*I checked and triple checked those damn syllables. So don’t even try and tell me these are not Haikus!; because they are now!

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