Ahmusings

The 98% humorous musings of M. Lizabeth Currain

Category: Politics

Fashion Week Ruins Everything According to Wealthy Neighborhood

In dishonor of New York Fashion Week (Feb 9th-16th) I am going to be sharing some fashion related thoughts with all of you throughout the week. As a note, I have a degree in Fashion Design and spent some time working for various fashion companies. It was the worst. I continue to have opinions about fashion, the main one being: Seriously, what the fuck are you wearing? So for the next week don your best headband and enjoy the ride.

via

Yesterday the New York Times ran an article about Fashion Week taking over Damrosch Park in Lincoln Center and annoying the neighborhood’s inhabitants.

The park is occupied (not by dirty hippies, like that other park) ten months out of the year due to Fall and Spring Fashion weeks, The Big Apple Circus from October to January, and private parties also under ritzy tents during the spring.

“Residents and some members of Community Board 7 said that in the past they had not looked forward to the four-month takeover of the park by the Big Apple Circus, but that they had grown used to it. Their frustration mounted, however, when Fashion Week arrived.

“It was the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back,” said Susan Levy, a resident of the Alfred.”

And my personal favorite:

“‘It’s an assault on the neighborhood,’ said Michael Graff, a lawyer who lives in the nearby Alfred condominium tower.”

Forgive me if I can’t seem to find my sympathy for Mr. Graff, who likely paid a million dollars for the condo he currently lives in. Hey, guess what Michael, my neighborhood is loud 24/7 and I don’t have the luxury of being 38-stories above the noise. I sleep with earplugs because the woman above me clomps around like a Clydesdale. I think you’ll survive.

“City officials brushed aside the criticism, saying that Damrosch Park was a hard-surface plaza with few visitors in winter. They argued that residents had ample access to nearby parkland, including Central Park, and said that many thousands of New Yorkers were able to enjoy the circus and the fashion shows.

“Fashion Week generates $865 million in economic activity each year and helps create jobs in one of our city’s most important industries,” said Julie Wood, a spokeswoman for Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg.”

There seems to be a lot of confusion about where some of those funds are being put and the NYC Park Advocates naturally think that the money Fashion Week pays Lincoln Center to use the park space should be put back into the city general fund instead of being used to finance fancy parties for rich people.

If Fashion Week gets kicked out Lincoln Center, where else can it go? Have the residents of the Lincoln Center area ever stopped for a second to think about that? There are literally no parks left for them to destroy if they live Damrosch! Bryant Park has already said, “Hell to the No” about fashion week! Central Park is all like, “Dahling, Fashion Week is for people who don’t know any better.” And Union Square is like, “PICK ME, PICK ME!” And no one likes desperation.

Next year I think it should be, “Honda Fashion Week at Flushing Meadows Park.” Just to wad everyone’s panties while they figure out how to get there.

Da Bears

In honor of California deciding that a voter approved ban on same-sex marriage was a dumb-fucking idea, (see also; unconstitutional) I’ve decided to talk about my favorite subset of the gay culture: BEARS

Having spent my birthday weekend last year in Provincetown during Bear Week and having made one laugh in a liquor store, I feel as though we have a connection now for the rest of our lives. I even bought a t-shirt!

Never have I been surrounded by as much body hair and mesh clothing as I was that weekend…and it was awesome. My favorite part is that they only seem to work out their arms; better to cuddle their cubs with, I guess?

At one point during the weekend, I was walking with my brother and his girlfriend and I heard this guy talking to his friends saying, “I’d suck every dick in this town!” I shouted back, “Hey! Me too!” (eh, not really, ’cause they were gay and wouldn’t be into it!) But there was a little boy with his family in front of me and he heard that…oops? Better that this boy learn now that it’s not just guys who go around doing that to each other; girls do it too. But you wouldn’t know that if your family always vacations in Provincetown for the Summer.

After that weekend I wanted to register the domain Bearaphernalia.com, but it was already taken. It could have either gone two ways, a really awesome online Bear community or a gay porn site. Both have their place in this world!

So, California, don’t make the mistake that a lot of people think you’re probably going to make! Don’t let the Supreme Court have a chance to mess this up.

You have a Bear on your flag for Christ’s sake! It’s only right!

Twitter Fight: Round Two!

Oh my gosh you guys! My Twitter fight really took off after I went to sleep last night. Not only did he tweet at me, but someone else got involved too! As far as I can tell @thomaswhardy is some sort of Australian Libertarian who believes that a woman’s womb is her own.

This just got crazy in the past hour! I’ll do my best to recreate the play-by-play. This is better than the Superbowl if you want my honest opinion.

So after letting his tweet sink in for a few minutes and then punishing myself with reading his other tweets, I cam across these two gems.

Previously I had been debating about whether or not to keep tweeting at him, but since it’s Sunday and I want to wait until the last possible minute to start that paper, I thought I’d go ahead and goad this person a little further.

Obviously, I know just what to say to get a response.

Oh! The typo to end all typos! That’s like when Santorum said “Black people” but insisted he said “Bleaugh people” as if that was any better. Also the whole 3 of 4 and 6 to 10…where is he getting that figure? By his calculations three men are producing 2 to 3 babies at a time and then aborting all of them. If that’s the case, where are all these children I see every day, coming from?!

(editor’s note: I am so mad at myself for not proofreading that above tweet more carefully!)

Reading comprehension is pretty low on the internet. Those two above tweets go together, but you wouldn’t realize it considering that nowhere did I “blame” men.

Guys, just do yourself a favor and don’t Google “blackgenocide.org”. It’s not worth it. I did have the “guts” to read it and under their mission they have Deuteronomy 30:19 listed. In case you’re wondering what that is:

King James Bible (Cambridge Ed.)
I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live

Now, really, that could be taken to mean a number of things. Like, “hey man, don’t kill yourself, you have kids to take care of” or something like that. It almost seems unlikely that the Bible would be addressing a woman directly, since they were thought of so highly back then. /sarcasm.

Well, TheFlaCracker’s tweet inspired one of my most favorite tweets I have ever written:

Oh man…I know it’s not cool to laugh at your own jokes, but damn! I was on fire.

A thinly veiled threat, maybe? I’m not really sure how threats on the internet work. I mean, I watched Cyberbu//y on ABCFamily, but all I got out of it was that the worst thing you can call a girl on the internet is a “whore.”

So, I decided I was going to put a stop to everything. Because, seriously you guys, I need to write this paper. It’s due tomorrow.

I was trying to bow out gracefully. I mean, I said “good day!” Which obviously means nothing, because 23 minutes later he comes back at me with these!

and my personal favorite

As the mature, 26 year old woman that I am, I’ve decided not to fan the flames of this giant moron any longer. Well, I did tweet on more thing at him, @modestmeaghan It was fun while it lasted. No one ever really “wins” on the internet, but it’s safe to say that I will be able to move on from this and he will probably still be tweeting from his parent’s basement in Tampa for the next billion years.

I SAID,  “GOOD DAY!”

 

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