Ahmusings

The 98% humorous musings of M. Lizabeth Currain

Tag: libraries

This Is What $75K Looks Like

In case any of you were ever wondering what $75,000 (plus interest!) looks like or what it buys you, let me enlighten you.

Image

Now, I don’t want to sound entitled, but I think  for $75k they should have at least included a frame. So not only did I spend almost a $100 grand on a piece of paper that looks like it was made by students in the Graphic Design program, I now have to spend an extra $20 for a frame?  Seriously, look at this piece of shit. I am pretty sure that is a sticker at the top under the name of the school I went to. A STICKER. And what font is that even? Times New Roman? I’m surprised they didn’t print it in Wing Dings.

And let’s not even get into the fact that Forbes named Library Science THE WORST MASTER’S DEGREE TO GET. And Pratt couldn’t even make up for that fact by printing it on a piece of paper larger than your standard 8.5″ by 11″.

And just for fun, I dug up my Diploma from undergrad and did a little comparison.

Look at how much bigger that thing is! And look at the delicate scribbles around the name of the university, which may I point out is IN LATIN. In fact, the whole god damn thing is in Latin, except for my fucking name. And for four years, it was roughly the same price when you factor in scholarships and various other things I did to get my tuition down (blow jobs, hand jobs, etc.). And! All that stuff was embossed! EMBOSSED. They had better sense than to use a fucking sticker.

So let me break this down for you in case you still aren’t getting it. $75,000 will get you an 8.5″ by 11″, MS Paint, Lisa Frank sticker wearing, Wing Ding, unframed piece OF BULLSHIT THAT WON’T GET YOU A JOB THAT WILL ALLOW YOU TO PAY BACK YOUR STUDENT LOANS BEFORE YOU DIE.

Group Projects

I cannot tell you all how much I hate working in groups. There is something about having to rely on other people for part of a grade or completing a project that is really annoying. I’d rather just do it all myself. It also seems very strange to me that library school is so hellbent on group projects when it seems as though most of the people in library school have a social disorder where they don’t know how interact with people. This is probably not making me friends in the library world. Eh.

I also especially hate when professors form your groups for you. Do you want to know why? Because if I was able to choose my own group, I would definitely not have chosen as one of my members, THE GIRL WHO CAN’T CONTROL THE VOLUME OF HER VOICE and talks and talks yet there is nothing meaningful coming out. I have experience with this girl, because unfortunately I had to work with her on two projects last semester. One being where we had to write a paper together. Do you all know how awful that is? She was like backseat typist. Listen bitch, Mario fucking taught me how to type, I know what I’m doing.

This is going to be a long semester.

This Week in Searches

Oy. It’s Friday again. It’s been a long week folks, between moving, working, and starting classes, I am beat. It looks like it is going to be an interesting semester. I can already tell there’s at least one person in each of my classes that I’m not going to be able to stand. We’ll see how it goes. Also, I have a date tonight with another OkCupid dweller. So it’s quite possible I won’t even be able to finish out the semester because my body will be hacked into little pieces and floating around the East River. Wish me luck? Also, this is a different guy than the one I went out with a week or two ago…the normal one. I’m not really picturing that going anywhere. I’m really living it up internet dating style though!

Let’s get down to business.

2011-08-26 to Today

Search Views
val kilmer 28
hurricane chow 5
mandy sellars gay 4
val kilmer top gun shirtless 3
girl with huge legs tlc show 2
chris farley schmitts gay 2
roy richard scheider 2
sam elliott 2011 2
roy scheider 2
hot girl with one leg? 2
sam elliott lifeguard 2
half ton teen 2
oprah winfrey’s baby boy 2
stallone 2
val kilmer leg 1
val kilmer in willow 1
steven seagal foto 1
hilarious and negetive 1
schmitts gay 1
cigarette holder women 1
pics of girl that was born with a tail 1
val kilmer no shirt 1
sam elliott in roadhouse 1
aj mclean y su novia 1
new stallone news 1
andrea beverly hills 90210 1
alexander james mclean 1
val kilmer pictures 1
val kilmer shirtless 1
why do girls wear anklets on only a single leg? 1
aj mclean 1
no whistling zone 1
i’ll call you this weekend 1
steve senders beverlly hills 1
tlc fat guy 1
val kilmer movies pics 1
is mandy sellars gay? 1
is mandy sellars gay 1
stupid hats winter 1
mermaid tails 1
my giant legs mandy gay 1

 

Val Kilmer really did his part this week in getting people over to Hilarious and Negative! Thirty-seven searches for Val Kilmer led people to my corner of the internet. I hope they were not disappointed. How could they be? Considering I delivered on the “Val Kilmer Willow” and “Val Kilmer shirtless” searches. I give the people want they want. That’s my job as an ambassador of this here internet town.

Also, why are so many people obsessed with finding out if Mandy Sellers is gay or not? It seems like her least interesting quality at this point considering that she HAS GIANT LEGS.

This one kills me: “why do girls wear anklets on only a single leg?”. I think I answered that question a few weeks ago on the very first installment of “This Week in Searches“. Because it’s tacky to wear them on both legs you guys. There is nothing worse than over-accessorizing your legs. Chill it with the anklets. I find it very amusing that this was a burning enough question that someone typed it into a search engine. In the past, this person would have had this question festering inside them for ages! Or they might have gone to their local library to look at books on ‘jewelry’ and ‘customs’. What a different world we live in now.

Such a different world that a girl has to go looking for dates on the internet because that’s where all the boys live. sigh.

 

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