Blah, it’s another exciting Friday. I need to break out of this funk I am in. But it’s raining, so I am using that as my excuse as to why I am in on a Friday night. I mean, I am 26 and single! I should be living it up on the streets of New York. I guess that’s not how I roll? I don’t know. I just looked at my post from last Friday…it was raining then too! The world is conspiring against me going out, kicking up my heels, and having a good time. For shame!
Anywhoo, here’s what you all came for. Or maybe not. I keep this up because it forces me to post and not give into my natural urge to lay on my couch and watch the rest of Wings.
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Wow. 42 people this week were looking for Jean Claude Van Damme in various states of undress. From just his underwear to his naked ass. I’m not surprised, it’s a nice ass. (Um…NSFW below!)
But come on you guys! He’s not a piece of meat! He’s a man, with feelings and thoughts. He definitely wouldn’t want us all sitting around our computers giggling about how hot is ass is. Ha! Who am I kidding? That’s all he wants us doing! Continue to titter away, internet!
jonathan frakes imdb What I love about this, is the person who typed this into a search engine, probably could have saved themselves like a fraction of a nano-second by just going to IMDB. I kind of hate it when people type a web-address into a search engine. That is what the address bar is for! Do people not know how to use the internet?! It’s been around for a while now, there are no excuses anymore. In one of my classes during my first semester of grad school, I sat next to a woman who tried to type an email address into the address bar. She also emailed the tech tutor to find out what a ‘web browser’ was. Of course she was in my group! The worst of it was that she tried showing me pictures of her kids. Take that nonsense elsewhere…I do not care about your children.
hilarious and negative and negative hilarious When I see this in the search terms, I like to pretend that my blog has a following. That people are reading this and then telling their friends, “oh hey, there’s this really cool blog out there called ‘Hilarious and Negative’, you should totally check it out. The chick who writes it, is so fucking hilarious and hot, I have no idea why she is single and hasn’t been snatched up by Ryan Gosling yet.” In fact, I’m pretty sure that’s how that is said every time. By me. Into my mirror in the morning.
Maybe tomorrow I’ll do something. Like go to a bar and buy an attractive stranger a drink. Or maybe I’ll just sit at home staring at my computer screen with a deadness behind my eyes, wondering what my life is becoming.
Sunday, Sunday, Sunday. Sunday gets a bad rap. It’s not her fault that she is the last day before everyone usually has to go back to work. That’s just the way the cookie crumbled for old Sunday. But no longer shall she be associated only with the dread of going back to work or school! Think of Sundays as your chance to see what weird crush I’ll have this week!
This Sunday, my gift to you is Michael Beihn!
I am naming Michael Biehn as a vintage crush, because I have loved him ever since I saw Terminator. Kyle Reese is probably one of my favorite characters in a movie. Mainly for delivering this line (scoot to about 51 seconds in):
When I was in high school, I wrote a speech for a competition about how Terminator was the greatest love story of our time. I still stand by this. HE TRAVELED ACROSS TIME FOR HER! The speech was pretty epic and went over well with my peers. I think the judges at the competition didn’t know what to make of it. Obviously, those judges had their heads planted firmly up their asses in the year 1984 when Terminator came out, otherwise I would have won.
Some basics according to IMDB:
Full Name: Michael Connell Biehn
Born: July 31, 1956 in Anniston, Alabama, USA
Height: 6′! Mama like.
Films/Television: He’s acted in 85 titles. Including Tombstone with fellow Vintage Crush, Val Kilmer. He’s also written and directed two things that no one probably cares about.
Fun Fact: Or ‘Sad Fact’…it said that the studio pushed for a nomination for best supporting actor for his role in The Abyss (excellent movie!) but he didn’t get it. Boo! He should have been nominated for Terminator.
…and, just tell me a time and place.
The last part of this is about to get to’ally nerdy.
“Was there someone special?” “Special?” “A girl, you know?”
“Sorry, I’m so sorry.”
“Pain can be controlled. You just disconnect it.” “So you feel nothing?”
“It was very old, torn, faded.”
“You seemed just a little sad.”
“I memorized every line, every curve.”
You don’t even want to know how much time I spent on that! But hey, at least I’m not making fan videos set to the music of Sarah McLachlan.
Have a good night everyone!